Decency

Going along to get along. Being nice to others so they are nice to me. Allowing logic to guide my thinking and my words. Spoken or written, logic wants to steer the proceedings. Emotions, however, do arise. Interesting how quickly they leap to action!

Facebook comments most often elicit the response. The best practice is to skip over the message. Sometimes, though, a graphic or picture draws me in. Then the purpose dawns and ire, love, pity or support speaks its reaction.

Yes, I unfollow people who seem all too ready to pounce on those who disagree with their position. This seems their purpose – to attract, stir up, then attack your reaction. Seems unnecessary to me. Conclusions are arrived at over time once the mind considers all the options and facts.

Discussion helps this logical process. Debate only stirs up strong positions. Note, I stated strong positions, not logical positions.

Decency is an asset in times such as these. Ellen DeGeneres asks us to ‘be kind to one another.’ That’s decency in action. It listens to what a person has to say. It listens to what the person is feeling. It allows emotion to erupt from feelings and, at the same time, keep logic from getting mired in emotions. Help the person with the emotions first. Then gently open the discussion to the facts. Soothe the ruffled feathers so meaningful discussion can be had.

Scoring a point is debate, not discussion. Finding fault is a debate strategy, not a logical conclusion. Faults are always part of the process; they are the tell-tales that perhaps a fact has not been represented accurately. Faults also broadcast the person’s motivation for the discussion. They have a point of view they are pressing forward. They are not interested in inputs. Their minds are already made up. They are out to score big in the debate.

The rest of us, however, are considering all the facts and attempting to learn from each other. Decency helps the process work. Kindness helps. Openness to competing ideas is helpful; it constructs layers of understanding the issues; and the co-dependencies of many issues.

Sorting things out is best done in calm. Strife and contentiousness clouds logic with emotions. It is inevitable. Best to avoid such competitions.
Unfollowing testy troublemakers is a good tactic to implement. Let them stew in their own concocted brew. Don’t get sucked in.

Instead, keep on your quest for facts and truth. These work together for better understanding. It is the critical element of logic.

Decency helps this process work.

July 10, 2020