When Your Kids Turn 50

I kind of remember what my mother said when she wished me a happy birthday on my 50^th. It went something like, “Just imagine what it’s like to realize your youngest is now 50! That makes me 81!!”

Well, I’m not 81, but not far behind. I am 78. I was 28 when my youngest was born. And yes, the 50^th birthday of one of your kids causes you to think.

What was I doing at 50? Well, for one, I was newly divorced and entering a totally unknown chapter of my life. One that was alien and scary. Add to that the reality that I was a late bloomer gay man who finally owned up to his sexual orientation. 50 and ready to explore a strange new world.

At the time my kids did not know about the gay thing. I had not told them yet. My oldest had just graduated from college and was living with me at a new townhouse near the old family home. That home was the only one the kids knew. It was my wish to stay close to their friends so they would not feel isolated from their roots.

My son was a sophomore in college and newly transferred from University of Missouri to Illinois State University. He had found just the right major closer to home and that suited us just fine. Closer and less costly!  A winning combination! He also lived with me when not on campus.

So, newly divorced, owning my own home, two nearly adult kids living with me, and still one year away from starting up my own business. The times were clearly unsettled, and I had a lot of growing up to do that no one would have imagined. Least of all me.

Leap forward 28 years and my oldest child is now 50, a wife and mother of two girls. Their oldest is a junior in college and on an international student exchange program at Oxford University. The second daughter is a senior in high school. And mom is a seasoned professional working remotely at home for a nationwide team of insurance and investment sales executives.

My son is 47 and a sales executive working from his home. He has two young boys 5 and 7 years old.

My family is settled. They are mature family people with issues like mine at the same age. They are no longer the young kids we nearly always think of, belying the passage of time.

Belying the passage of time. A common theme in so much of living our lives. I doubt I am the only one doing that. You too?

Just think back 50 years and see how sit feels.

November 9, 2021