Right and Wrong

We learn to live with others while growing up. We are get ‘rules’ handed down by parents, siblings, grandparents and other family, as well as a host of rules from school, church and society at large. Each of us absorbs and adapts to these rules or social mores differently and at different speeds; but eventually we all get the message.

Over thousands of years, one basic rule prevails: Treat others as you want to be treated. Depending on the culture in which you were raised, this rule goes by different names. For Christians and Jews it is known as the Golden Rule.

It has become a core value of American culture; each religious heritage in America gradually came to recognize this value.

Other shared values in our social interactions are related to the Ten Commandments. These came from the Old Testament of the Bible and were handed down thousands of years ago in both Greek and Aramaic texts and are embedded in both Jewish and Christian faiths.

The Commandments are: One: I am the one true God; do not worship any others; Two: Do not create any graven images or idols; Three: Do not take the Lord’s name in vain; Four: Keep the Sabbath holy; Five: Honor your father and mother; Six: Do not murder; Seven: Do not commit adultery; Eight: Do not steal; Nine: Do not lie or bear false witness; Ten: Do not covet your neighbor’s property.

All in all a good set of rules to live by. Whether a follower of faith or an atheist, these rules hold well for most of us. In the case of an atheist, the first four commandments would fall on deaf ears but there remains some vestige of guidance in them still.

Common Law came to America from England. It is the ancient law of England based on social customs as recognized and enforced by judgments and decrees of the courts. They  are the general body of statutes and case law that governed England and the American colonies prior to the American Revolution. After our Revolutionary War, American courts built case law based on our Constitution coupled with the common acceptance of applicable Common Law concepts.

The Common Law, Ten Commandments and Golden Rule, then, are basic values we accept in society to guide our lives as we live in common. This keeps order and a basis upon which to build more complicated laws and an ethic.

Where do we go with this from here?

Many thoughts spring to mind. Our ethos (or shared core values) is helpful in determining right and wrong. We get help from our ethos to discern between fact and fiction, or truth and falsehood. It is much more difficult to apply in the real world of course. Our lives in the social context encounter complexities layered on top of complexities. Public discussions reflect that complexity as ideas and points of view are aruged endlessly.

Religious debate runs the gamut from freedom to tension in a hurry. Political debate descends rapidly to noisy clashing of ideologies whetted with religious fervor. No wonder it is difficult to keep our bearings in this environment!

I have an idea, simple really, maybe too simple?

What would happen if we stopped talking and listening when someone makes a statement of certainty based on religion or ideology without the necessary proofs? Could we really do this without letting our tempers flare? Could we discipline ourselves well enough to make this tactic work?

What would be the likely effect if we could be this disciplined?

Maybe the following would occur:

• We would think well before uttering a statement
• We would be prepared to offer proof of our statement’s truth, historical fact, etc.
• Yearning to be heard and understood, we would be more careful about listening to our conversants; what are they trying to say; are they making sense? Can we help them make their statement clearer and more factual?
• Can we be selfless enough to help each other understand our points of view?
• Might this growing understanding lead to more creative opportunities to address common problems?

You get the idea.

Right now we are talking at each other for the most part. We are whipping each other’s hot buttons to get a reaction, whether avid support or bald rejection. Either does little to enlighten our discussion.

Communication is a delicate act of sharing meaning between two people at the minimum, and a vast audience at the opposite pole. Either situation requires trust and cooperation to allow meaning to transfer from one party to the other. I think we take this for granted without being conscious of it. But we must become alert to it. It may be the only path toward a better social life.

I want that. Do you? Do we? If the answer is yes, what must we do to make it a reality?

October 21, 2011