Making Conversation

I found a quote on the internet the other day and it piqued my interest:

“I like people who can keep the conversation going no matter how random the topics get.”  ~Anonymous

I like this statement because it reminds me that topics abound. There is a lot to talk about. Especially abundant are topics when we are curious how the planet works, how various subjects interrelate, and where that logic takes us. Such conversations or discussions are fun. They expand our knowledge and consciousness. They are productive.

Converting every conversation to a political point of view is boring. And destructive of positive results, in my mind.

Rather than wasting time arguing or debating, we need to discuss and converse. As politely as possible, too!

Young adult novelist Libba Bray reminds us:

            “Your mind is not a cage. It is a garden. And it requires cultivating.”

One hopes cultivation includes sprinkling ones thoughts with those from others. We need to let our minds freely explore. There is much to learn. And relearn.

For example, Alfie Kohn, American author and explorer of learning, tells us:

“So how should we reward teachers? We shouldn't. They’re not pets. Rather, teachers should be paid well, freed from misguided mandates, treated with respect and provided the support they need to help their students become increasingly proficient and enthusiastic learners.”

He says it straight out: let teachers work with students to achieve superior learning skills. This produces self direction. It will also lead to discovery and motivation. That is the result of education. That is what the educational system should be focusing on. Not rules and norms and discipline. Learning. Discovery. Self confidence to accept what is being discovered by the self.

A good conversation is like good education. It provides opportunity to share thoughts and facts so we can discover more thoughts and facts. It is expansive. It is not a game of winning and losing.

John F. Kennedy challenged us with this thought:

“Let us not seek the Republican answer, or the Democratic answer, but the right answer. Let us not seek to fix the blame for the past. Let us accept our own responsibility for the future.”

Yes. Focus on the future. What will it be? How can we make it happen for the best of us? What contributions do we need to deal with the future? The ideas, the logic, the dreams and hopes of so many people, how do we pull them together and make them work for the common good?

In the spirit of Kennedy, we need to leave behind the fault finding and credit assignments. We need to share our hopes for the future and build it together. As one people. As one nation.

Part of the challenge is finding the right topics to focus on. Will it be finances? Or education? Or military objectives? Or World Peace? Or what?

One topic is suggested by President Obama:

“When our children’s children look us in the eye and ask if we did all we could to leave them a safer, more stable world, with new sources of energy, I want us to be able to say yes, we did.”

That poses the challenge fairly clearly, doesn't it? The challenge is still huge but at least we are seeing it clearly.

Do our conversations, with one another or in larger settings, advance our hope for the future? Or do the conversations mire us endlessly in name calling and debate winning? Are we earnestly seeking truth and solutions to problems? If we are, why are the problems going unsolved? If we aren't doing this work, why not?

Perhaps we don’t have faith in our ability to understand complex issues? Maybe we don’t trust each other enough to engage in honest conversations? Maybe we feel uncomfortable about our innate intellectual abilities or education? Whatever it is, it is keeping us from finding the right ideas which are needed to fix what we agree are problems in America.

Why can’t we jettison the distorted news machines of cable TV and get back to being honest citizens one to another?

Talking it out. Conversing. Over a drink or a meal, or a piece of pie. Let’s find the resolve to do this. We used to before TV, radio and computers were every-second parts of our lives. Some of us remember the 1940’s and 50’s. Back then the art of conversation held sway.

Maybe we need to get some of that era back!

February 5, 2014