Desperation

I was at the UIC Scholarship dinner (University of Illinois at Chicago). I forget the year, but it was most likely 1985. My wife and I were asked to host a scholarship recipient at the dinner. We met her when we first sat at table. She was a straight A student, a Junior, and a young woman from Viet Nam. My role later was to introduce her to the gathering as she received her scholarship.

We asked her many questions during dinner. We asked her of life in Viet Nam, how the war had tortured her family’s life, what led her out of her native land and how she came to America. We learned of her current academic interests and her career aspirations. In all these discussions, the theme for her that evening, the theme I would use in her introduction, was resolve. Resolve to survive hardship. Resolve to survive chaos and death. Resolve to find a way forward. Resolve to be herself in all the potential that lay ahead for her.

Her story was gripping. Just the telling of it held me and the audience in rapt attention.

Her family was from a small village where they were farmers. War visited them early and pushed them to a crowded village with other displaced Vietnamese families. Together they scraped together food to feed one another, shelter to protect them from storms and privacy to protect their dignity. War kept them on the move until they were located to a Laotian prisoner of war camp.

In desperation the men planned their escape. They found a beat-up boat, small but able to carry 18 people. The plan was to cross the water from the camp to an island 3 miles or so away, away from the enemy and toward friendly American troops.

The night began with storms which gave them cover. However, soon after they had left shore, their captors discovered them missing. They searched nearby waters and spotted them. The small boat was awash, over laden and about to sink. Two of their number went overboard and drowned. Captors quickly reached them and returned them to camp and punishment.

Two months later they tried again to escape. This time the boat was a little larger but they crammed 30 people into it. They shoved off in the dark of night. Nearly capsizing, a few passengers volunteered to leave the boat but trail it closely. That saved the remaining passengers, but the three who left were never seen again. 

Paddling with makeshift oars, the band of now 27 people (men, women and children) slopped their perilous way toward friendly fire. Three more passengers slipped over the side of the boat and drowned. Finally, an American patrol boat spotted them and pulled them to their boat. The now 23 escapees were safe. Among the dead - our student's mother and father.

Later they were evacuated by American military to San Francisco where they were processed and sent to foster communities in the Midwest. Our guest of honor had worked hard to survive, to keep her focus on possibility, and committed to building a life that matters.

With a degree in Engineering, her career remained ahead of her.

I have often wondered what became of her, where she found her career, what she accomplished and what her unfolding family life would be like. I never learned any of this.

But what I learned that evening was courage to be, resolve to accept the resources at hand, and the dedication to make the best of it no matter what. She taught me that.

Her example informs us of how fortunate we are in this land of plenty and freedom. We forget the lives of desperation others endure just because of their place of birth. Today it is not Southeast Asia in the spotlight. Today it is central America and the wanton death and destruction done by gangs, marauding militias and despotic rulers. We do not know what that is like.

They do. They plot their escape. They dare a perilous journey. They risk life and health of themselves and loved ones. Finally, they reach sanctuary.

The least we can do is grant them an open door and safety. Their courage will strengthen us.

April 7, 2021