Old and New Thinking

Nearly 500 postings and 20,000 visits have occurred since the beginning of the blog. During that time we have explored many topics. Many are philosophical. Others are political. Still others are cultural, spiritual and poetic.

My passion in life is to be useful to others. Don’t know how I got started on this path but it has long been with me. I strain to accurately understand what is going on around me and what it means for the long term wellness of mankind on this planet. That’s a big picture orientation to be sure. It may seem pie in the sky to some – probably most! But not to me. This makes the most sense to me.

As I watch conflicting points of view used to win power rather than expand understanding, frustration sets in.

Recently our household began viewing all of the West Wing television series. We are currently on episode 92. As we hungrily consume the episodes anew we are reminded of why we were such fans of the series in the first place. West Wing almost perfectly matched our confidence in America’s sense of itself and what it ought to be doing in the world. The issues examined in the fast-paced program mirror the same issues with which we struggle today. If you’d like a refresher course, rent the series from Netflix. You’ll be glad you did.

What we are re-discovering for ourselves is that today’s thinking is old and worn out. We’ve been here before and handled it better. Can’t we cut through the drama and angst and get to the healthy conclusions sooner?  We have the ability. We have more resources. We understand the issues more clearly. Certainly we can set aside our wild lust for power so we can actually do the work of the people?

If you want to understand how the political system works re-watch West Wing. The same parties are playing key roles. The argument for and against big government continue to be mouthed. The nonsense and game playing remain in place. Obstruction of progress and non-resolution of problems continues, as well.

Same-o, same-o. Then West Wing was imitating life. Now one wonders if life is imitating art. After all it is a re-run.

Only thing is, I think we can do better. We’d better do better!

February 28, 2013

Sorting Things Out

This quote was passed on to me the other day:

Chinese Proverb: “The person who says it cannot be done should not interrupt

       the person doing it.”

                                                                                    ~Copyright: Magnetic Graffiti Co.

You remember the old adage: “You won’t like seeing how sausage or laws are made.” Well this Chinese Proverb is in the same league. If you want to solve a problem or get something done that no one else wants to do, don’t let those others get in your way of doing the work. Just do it!

Related to this, I think is this same bit of arcane facts:

            “Wages:

                        Salary of retired US Presidents: $450,000 for life

                        Salary of House/Senate members: $174,000 for life

                        Salary of Speaker of the House: $223,500 for life

                        Salary of Majority/Minority Leaders: $193,400 for life

                        Average salary of a solider serving in Afghanistan:  $38,000

                        Average income for seniors on Social Security: $12,000

            I think we found where the cuts should be made!”

                                                                                    ~Anonymous on Internet

It amazes me at times how we miss the basics. The facts of life are staring us in the face. If you want something done, do it yourself. What I think is not always commonsense to someone else. The problems we endure are often made by us and can only be solved by us.

Watching TV you’d think the world has gone to hell in a hand basket. You’d think all problems are imponderable and unsolvable. There is such a din of noise made over the news we tend to forget that it matters to the news provider that they say and do what they do. It builds audience. It attracts viewers. They get to air ads to that audience and make money doing it. If the world were calm, peaceful and logically put to bed each evening, there would be little purpose for the TV news. It is in their interest to keep news flowing, or what passes these days as news.

I remember a simpler time when news was slow getting distributed. Newspapers were written on a daily basis. What was happening in the world was sorted out and shared around the globe. News gathering teams assembled the words about those happenings, wrote stories and printed them in the newspapers. Eventually these news bits made it on the radio and then TV news programs. The speed of spreading the news accelerated quite a bit.

Today, news channels on TV and cable networks compete with each other to have the most news, the latest news, the most interesting news broadcast around the clock. To compete they sometimes make the news seem more urgent, or ominous. Getting someone to pay attention becomes a full time job of marketers and broadcast management. The job of writing the news or making sense of it gets lost.

Along with that we get lost in meaningless details disconnected to what matters. After awhile we begin to make up news – at least the why and what it means content!

Whatever happened to the concept of news: the who what when and where? Today it is all about the why accompanied by a leer, sneer and meaningful glare! Think Nancy Grace and you’ll have my point down perfectly!

News indeed.  Of course I want to know why something has meaning. I need analysis done for me so I can get up to date quickly. But that analysis needs to be open and transparent. The questions being answered or posed need to be clear and open. Over time we come to agreement on what something means and understand why something happened. It becomes a public accounting of news items; not a proscription of meaning.

Meanwhile, leave me room to do my own thinking. It takes time. Like the old time news delivery system. Time to think and process. Time to understand. Not time to be told.

That’s up to me.

February 27, 2013

Workable Wisdom

Ozzy Amos has a presence on the internet. One site is named something like ‘formidable republican opposition’.  Here’s an example of what he is sharing:

“I could end the deficit in five minutes. You just pass a law that says that any time there’s a deficit of more than three percent of GDP, all sitting members of Congress are ineligible for re-election.”     ~Warren Buffet

Workable. Wise. See what I mean?

Congress is the only entity authorized by the US Constitution to spend money and make budgets. Only Congress. They spend it. They finance it. No one else. It is not a problem for the Judiciary – the courts. It is not a problem for the Executive branch – the President and White House. No; it belongs to Congress.

They are responsible for solving the problem they have made.

Warren Buffet has it right, I think. Own your own problems and manage them appropriately.  Or else get out of town and let someone else work on it.

I think this point is all I have to say today.

Thank you, Mr. Buffet!

February 26, 2013

Meaning and More

Several years ago I read Tuesdays with Morrie, a small book authored by Mitch Albom. It was the story of Albom meeting with a man, Morrie, dying of cancer. He devoted Tuesdays for meeting with Morrie and exploring life – Morrie’s life as it had been, was now, and what he imagined the transition into death to be. An interesting read at any stage of life, it is especially helpful for those people dealing with the death of a loved one or one’s own demise.

This morning I came across a quote from Mitch. Here it is:

“The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning.”

I like this thought very much. It demonstrates the life-long process of accumulating meaning in our life. I don’t think the process is a series of ‘bams’ –  explosions of insight. I think it is a slow accumulation of conclusions we make based on experience and shocks to that experience. The shocks are moments when new ideas bump into our established thinking. The shocks jar us to think or see something in a new way.

Of course the process is affected by surroundings, feelings, moods and health status. All of these and much more are constantly changing. These changes constantly act upon our established thinking. We change our minds on things. Some ideas change in major ways. Others are tweaked in very minor shifts. But change is constantly present and our thinking is always in process.

The older I get the more philosophical I become. To beat back the scourges of disease, faulty thinking, addictive behaviors, whatever plagues us, it works better if we focus outside of our own being. Life happens to each of us. But it is not about us. An oxymoron if I ever saw one!

Moving beyond self….is a phrase I’ve used here before. It is appropriate here, too.

Getting outside of me opens the world to exploration on its terms, not mine. What is out there in the world is on its own terms, not mine. It is my job to figure out what it means, why it exists and all of that. But if I don’t figure it out correctly, it is OK. Because it does not depend on me to provide the other with meaning. It has that all on its own whether I understand it or not.

It’s OK. All on its own.

I was in a group discussion with youth last night. One of us was asked to share his story. He did. It tumbled out in phrases and spurts. Sometime articulate (to me) but often disjointed. The whole of it, however, made sense. His story was complicated and filled with anxiety. Worrisome and ominous in terms of consequences. But his countenance was calm and logical. He was sharing. This was his story; not mine. And it made sense. By the end of his narrative I realized ‘it was OK’. He was OK. He would make it fine. Eventually. Maybe not right this minute, but eventually he would be OK.

I watched the reaction of others in the room to hearing this young fellow’s story. I wondered then and now how they absorbed the story and made sense of it in their lives. Did they see the connection? Did they understand the dynamics shared among all the people in the group last night? What did it mean to them?

This morning at 4 am I awoke with the phrase buzzing in my mind…it’s OK.

They have to work through it. It will be OK. Meantime it is OK…for now.

Meaning comes to us in dribs and drabs. What is going on outside of us helps us see ourselves eventually. Eventually. Outside of self.

Yes.

February 25, 2013

Thought for the Day

Here’s a good thought to ponder over the weekend:

“Today I chose to live with gratitude for the love that fills my heart, the peace that rests within my spirit, and the voice of hope that says ‘all things are possible’.”            

                                                                                                           ~Namaste Café

Some of our pondering needs to tackle these barriers to making the most of the quote:

-Do I love? Without love gratitude is hard to recognize

-Do I love myself at the very least? Hard to love others if we do not or cannot love self

-We have much to be grateful for; we live with these elements full time so often do not

recognize them

-Peace or serenity comes with time; it comes with love, gratitude, settled-ness

-Hope means we have a forward view of life; we expect good things to happen, and we

            help make them happen

-Being intentional makes things possible; we build our own capability and hope.

And finally, a companion quote worth thinking about:

            “Most of the problems in life are because of two reasons:

                        We act without thinking, or

                        We keep thinking without acting.”

                                                                                    ~Anonymous

Take time this weekend to think on these things. Monday will happen regardless but make it be worth something more than otherwise!

February 23, 2013

Apologies

When we are wronged do we expect or demand an apology? When we are wrong toward another person do we freely apologize? Is this equation equal in our life? Do I give what I expect?

I doubt that very much. It is human to err and worse, not even realize our failure. Yet the opposite is quite different. We know when we are wronged. We feel it. It is apparent.

Knowing oneself well is a big challenge. Examining the self is time consuming and rarely follows a straight-line logic. It meanders as we face the challenges of reality. Discovering the small hollows in our psyche and coming to understand them take time.

If we need this time what can we possibly expect from others? They, too, need time to understand themselves and the world they inhabit. How could they possible know they have wronged me? At any given time?

With that as background this quote from Robert Brault makes sense:

            “Life becomes easier when you learn to accept an apology you never got.”

Pretty good, huh? It is not exactly like letting water roll off your back, it embraces much more; I think it means we allow others to make their errors as though they are unintended just as we make the same mistakes. Somehow that frees my spirit to be more positive, less dragged down by others. This liberty empowers me to keep my journey moving undeterred by others.

It is easy to be pulled off track. It takes work to gain the discipline in seeking higher ground. It is also known as forgiveness.

Lest we forget, the reward benefits the forgiver, not the forgiven. We usually get that wrong. Forgiving is an act of trust in self and mankind. It provides liberty to be all that I can be.

Opening the door to that realization may lead to a life with fewer regrets. Maybe even fewer resentments?

I’ll have to think about this more. What do you think of this idea? Is it a stumbling block to our happiness or a door ajar for our discovery?

February 22, 2013

In Whom I Trust

Cold and blustery this morning. Wind is whooping at 20 to 27 miles per hour. Temps are around 16. A little snow fell last night. High temp will be 20 by mid day then falling to the low single digits during the night. Winter. Brrr! Well, it is into the second half of February. If it is to be cold now is the time.

Still, we have had a mild and pleasant winter season. Very little snow. A little ice. None of it lasted long. Balmy breezes dried up the snow and evaporated the ice. Roadways were navigable and safe. The days are already lengthening and mild days bring smells redolent of spring. It comes!

Gray days when weather conditions are changing. Bright sunny days when the weather high is overhead and cold. Dark and gloomy days are a usual partner to our Midwestern winters. Some years we are in the dark for 3 months solid. Others are highly variable.

What does this all mean? Funny you should ask! A college chum back in those days told me when I was glum that the sun shines bright in the morning. So, get over it! Dump the blahs and seek the sunny side of the street,…and day.

That is not always easy to do. Some problems nag us and cause sustained worry. Others drop their gloom on us suddenly but repeatedly. As I age I get better and weathering these set backs but I still have them. They still unsettle me. I guess the lesson is persistence.

Sitting in a group meeting the other day we were talking about how we are prone to let past habits drag us down from time to time. That is until one woman reminded us that life is so much more rewarding without that behavior and that alone drives her towards the rewarding outcomes. Her journey has an impeller that presses on toward the good. The bad is neatly and now easily avoided.

In church the other day we were asked to identify what we trusted in. We were asked to write that down on a note card. On the other side we were asked what we didn't trust in and record it on the card. My trust was in ‘community.’ My distrust or worry was housing. That’s to be expected. We are in the process of losing our house. It is a long and time consuming process, but the outcome is inexorable – the house will go either in short sale or foreclosure. It takes months for the process to unfold but we remain in place to keep the house safe from frozen pipes and to maintain as high an asset as possible. We could just leave but that wouldn't be fair to the lender. So here we sit.

I don’t really expect to become homeless. But the thought crosses my mind. We will be able to rent a place once we are out of the house but where is an open question. We just hope it will be close by in the same community in which we live right now.

Over the years the supply of elder housing has become more of a problem. This type of housing shares these common elements – reasonable or low cost, stable pricing over time, one-level living, modest size for ease of maintenance. Those are the elements most commonly sought after. But location is another for me. I need a diverse community around me, one that has interesting thoughts and activities. So we don’t get bored or feel unneeded. Life has been filled with purpose up until now and I wouldn't want it to become the opposite at this point in life. What a waste that would be!

Trust in community – people joyfully living in close proximity with one another and caring about each other – so the living experience is expansive, growing. From that environment adequate housing emerges. I know that is happenstance at best. But I trust that community will make it more a rock solid feature eventually. Not in time for us, perhaps, but in time……..

February 21, 2013

The Main Challenge

I don’t want to sound like a broken record, or a nag, but there is so much more we can do to improve our lives than there is to find fault.

The latter has many devotees. Enemies, mostly. Nags, too! They seem only interested in spotting weaknesses in others and fault in thinking. Then they rhapsodize on their findings and dwell on what that all means. Of course they don’t reflect on what their fixation means about them. No; not even for a second!

Faults have one and only one value. They let us know that perfection is absent and may need attention. It does not mean attention need be applied immediately; only that something could be better and we have work to do.

Being a critic can become a full time job. But it is an easy job. If I don’t focus on my own weaknesses it is very easy to snoop into the lives of others. And so much more fun!

Yet it doesn't really provide a good end, does it? If we take the above scenario to its lengthy conclusion all we have is a devastating look at what is wrong in the life of someone else. Or what is wrong with our company, organization or nation. And who is wrong. And blah, blah, blah. No. it does not make us feel good or help us build a meaningful future.

To do that we must move several steps ahead. And imagine a more perfect situation. A more perfect condition. One in which we help each other solve problems common to us all. Seeking possibilities and future that will improve on our situation.

This is creative work. It is positive. It requires us to use multiple centers of intellectual talent and experience. It allows us to combine strengths to battle weaknesses. It helps reduce or erase the negatives. We are accomplishing more than what we are failing at!

Now there is something to imagine!

Cultivating vision of the future is not empty headed or useless work. It is an act of creation. It is fulfilling. It is sensitive to the needs of others. It employs our humanity to serve real needs and purposes.

It is not a world of big government or all-knowing ideology or know-it-all jerkdom. No. it is an act of hope and trust in mankind. At some point it will rely on big government perhaps, like in educational institutions and research and teaching. It relies on big government for overall defense of our nation and our people. It relies on the government to maintain order in the chaos of competing states seeking their own successes.

No. Meeting challenges is a good thing and fun to do. Benefits accrue to everyone if we do this right. Also, it teaches us that we can handle complex issues in positive ways. Saying no is easy. Finding fault is easy.

The true test of our humanity is whether we can lend a hand to someone else, or if we can share our creative ideas to improve our future together.

Do we have such faith in each other that we can do this?

If you do it is time to let others know and urge them to get moving on the solutions to many problems. You might start with your congressman or senator in Washington DC! Or the same in your statehouse.

Just saying……

February 20, 2013

Making Good Things Happen

Good things do happen. They are the opportunities that pop to mind or stare you in the face. For some reason they are there to be noticed. They are present more often than we think they are. Usually we are too consumed with other matters to see opportunities that stick out like a sore thumb if but we look.

By now you know I write this blog daily and often in advance of publishing. So the spark that gives birth to a blog posting is not in sync with the dates you see on this page.

As I write this blog it is a Friday morning. This evening I will meet with the youth AA group. I look forward to the challenges they will present and wonder how we all will handle them. My overriding concern, however, is how these meetings give each attendee the tools they need to make the most of life. They are already challenged by the negative. They have been charged with underage drinking, DUI, underage drug possession and/or use. Some of them have gone on to other illegal activities that have landed them in jail or prison. They do not generally trust adults, parents or the public at large. They are cynical. They are hurt. Wounded.

In this condition they do not think clearly enough to accept the good that surrounds them. To them everything looks spoiled or suspicious. Meanwhile we must face the facts that they do not have the life-experience-tools that will help them. Their wounded-ness has restricted their resources to think clearly about opportunities.

From the internet I found this quote the other day; it is from www.livelifehappy.com:

            “When you focus on problems, you’ll have more problems. When you focus

             On possibilities, you’ll have more opportunities.”

All of us tend to dwell on the problems we face. It is with great difficulty that we shove them aside momentarily to place our attention on possibilities. The potential, the future, the open opportunities that are literally everywhere – these are the things that give us hope and motivation to get past the problems. These are the things that fuel our imagination and secret talents.

When you are kid parents and authority figures tend to take over your life. They loom large and don’t seem available for listening. Even if they were, the kid wouldn't believe it. The surface transaction to them is: “Do as I say.” “Do as you are told.”

As long as this communication dynamic is present the kid will likely clam up but not be listening or learning what is wanted most. Instead he/she will be searching for another way; it may not be the most productive. Escape most likely!

Tony Gaskins has said:

“You teach people how to treat you by what you allow, what you stop, and what you reinforce.”

And that works in the reverse, too. Problem is the parties to the communication are not listening to one another. No matter the level of caring or love, if we are not listening the message is not being processed or taken to heart. It is flitting around unheard.

I’m hoping I will be listening to what the kids say tonight. I want to hear what they have to say. Mostly I want them to turn their attention to what interests them the most so we can help them build a future that turns them on to life itself. I want them to have possibilities that nurture their happiness.

And I hope they are listening and trusting should I have something to share with them that will help them. So they can use it for their future.

I wonder if this will happen? I’ll keep you posted on developments.

February 19, 2013

What We Can Do

Leadership can go only so far. To accomplish what the leader asks of us requires a commitment from us, the followers. I’m asserting here that the followers are informed and willing. They share the vision proffered by the leader. I’m not speaking of lemmings blindly following the lead lemming over the cliff!

So here we are. America at a junction point. We can go to the right and downsize both the government and the economy. We could go left and invest in people, education, and infrastructure that will boost the economy and generate new revenues to strengthen economy, reduce deficits and lower the national debt. Or we can continue going straightforward doing nothing to upset anyone but let the economy carry the load of everyone else.

Results are partially in: down sizing the government has occurred and continues so. Employment by government at all levels – federal, state, county and municipal – has declined for several years now and continues to do so. Downsizing government? It’s happening. And with it goes the economy. The private sector has been creating new jobs; the public sector has not. But unemployment and its costs continues with only slight improvement. Yet the deficits continue but at a slower rate. This means national debt continues to grow. These conditions suck the life out of the economy and its people; not the government! So the right-wing pathway is not a very good route to take although we are on that path and have been since George W. Bush took office.

The left-wing path is actually more centrist. It relies on government to prime the pump with the programs that will build the economy in a manner that will produce sustainable growth with lesser and lesser government funding. That is the purpose of education programs: to improve the quality and employability of our citizens so they get off unemployment and build stronger companies. In turn they pay taxes as do the workers. Tax collections support government operations and reduce deficits and national debt. Sustainably. On-going. Investing in our people and infrastructure makes for a better, more productive and sustainable business climate. And the long term expense is paid off reasonable with long term debt. As it always has.

Keeping on the current path settles nothing and solves very few problems. It is not a fruitful pursuit.

If the American people believe the above, then it is time they took action. Like President Reagan’s admonition, we hired our representatives in the House and Senate, now tell them what to do! Tell them to vote for a jobs bill. Tell them to support education reforms. Tell them to invest in infrastructure renewal. Tell them to support new energy discoveries which lead to no importation of foreign oil.

Tell them we want the incivility and name calling to stop. Tell them we want real solutions to national problems not noise and bluster signifying nothing.

The time to act is now. Call and write your congressperson and senator today. And keep the dialogue going. You are the boss. Be sure they hear you.

If we all did this our will and consensus will become apparent. And they will act in accordance. Keep doing this week after week until they are doing the will of the people.

Are you ready? Will you make this commitment? I don’t care if you don’t agree with my point of view, but I do care that you make your opinion and wishes known to your elected official. They do not know what’s on your mind unless you tell them.

So do it! Just do it!

Thank you.

February 18, 2013

Thought for the Day

Actually I have two thoughts for the weekend.

First: “The two most contagious things in the world are hatred and laughter; one a

           disease and the other a cure.”             ~Richard Doyle

Second: “I love recovery. Clean, sober and everything in between.”  ~Anonymous

May your weekend be calm and peaceful and filled with joy!

February 16, 2013

Technology

As best as I can remember we have been on AT&T for phone, cell phone, internet and cable TV off and on for nearly 20 years. Due to rising monthly rates, our retirement and reduced income, we slashed our technology bills as often as we could. About two years ago we arrive at the latest point of equilibrium: Consumer Cellular through AARP for our cell phones, AT&T for our speedy internet, and AT&T for cable TV. We dumped the land line phone service to save $30 per month. We had a succession of cable TV providers including Dish Network (twice!), SBC Global, and Comcast. Finally in exasperation – the trees continued to grow and interfere with our dish reception – we returned to AT&T.

We got wireless service within the house so we could take our lap tops anywhere. The speed was super good. The TV signal was strong, uninterrupted and affordable. Then the problems began.

First, the wireless receiver on the living room flat screen started to cut out. It froze the picture and pixilated frequently. We rebooted the system frequently. Finally we asked for a service call. They said the receiver was faulty and installed a new one.

After a few months the pixilation and frozen picture began again. This time AT&T sent out a technician to test the cable service outside our home; they ordered a boost in the signal (don’t ask me the how and why!) but the problem continued. They sent a new receiver box and we installed it. Problem solved.

Or so we thought. The same problem of frozen picture and pixilation returned and we called. Three calls to tech support were placed. Each call lasted approximately one hour – this on our cell phone minutes plan! Finally, they sent a new receiver box. We installed it; well we tried but it wouldn't boot. So another call to tech support. They sent a two-man team this time, spent 5 minutes in the house, pushed a red reset button on the main modem, smiled, apologized and left.

Within a few hours frozen picture and pixilation re-occurred. We put up with it. We cannot bear calling tech support again. Besides at our ages we cannot understand them. Too bad; they sound nice! And oh so patient!

So then we called Comcast and asked for a super saver plan for senior citizens. As a gay household we can do without the sports stations, but do appreciate HGTV, DYI and the art channels. And the news stations minus Fox!

We haven’t signed on the dotted line yet but we understand the cost of the various programs, the speed of the promised new internet connection and when the bill will rise after the 12-month trial basis. Even then the rates will be cheaper than AT&T!

I just want to say this about the situation: businesses wishing to serve older markets need to make their terms and language understandable; rates need to be cheap so we can continue to connect to the world and participate even though we sit at home a lot; we have good ideas to share but find the costs increasingly prohibitive to share them; also, and finally, the services themselves need to be simplified. It would be fantastic if all services were wireless so cables and outlets need not run throughout the home.

We continue with our Consumer Cellular cell phone service. They are terrific, reasonably priced and easy to understand. We can only hope that Comcast will demonstrate that they have improved since we were last with them and that their rates don’t escalate quickly!

Meanwhile we did learn that the A in AT&T stands for ‘arrogant’. Too bad. Maybe one day they will learn better.

February 15, 2013

State of the Union

Although this is Valentine’s Day, my mind is on the State of the Union Address. I wanted to offer my own state of the union assessment. I doubt others will pay attention to it but I need to get this off my chest.

The condition of our nation is so-so. I can say this confidently because of the following elements present in our daily lives:

• Enormous potential exists in the capability of the American People
• Labor supply is readily available to employ and ever willing!
• Educational preparation of our labor pool is the envy of the world
• The economy is growing again and on a better footing than before the recession
• With bubbles burst the American economy can now focus on what really needs to be done
• The Iraq War is over; it is now the responsibility of the Iraqi people
• The Afghanistan War is drawing down; the Afghani must take ownership of their own nation, affairs and war
• The American People appear to understand the realities of their society, its challenges and are ready to make things happen

On the negative side are these challenges:

• Political opponents focused on their own power needs rather than on the needs of the nation
• Education system which pays too much attention to the product of parental dysfunction and not enough on student intellectual development
• Our nation relies on the benefits of an educated public but then dumbs down their expectations
• An enormous stockpile of discovery and invention exists in dust-covered university archives ignored by national leaders
• America diverts its attention away from what we could accomplish by focusing on entertainment and self gratification

I’m just finishing The Art of Power by Jon Meacham, a biography of Thomas Jefferson. It is a fascinating read. It details the trials Jefferson and our early republic went through in proving the constitution worked. Then as now questions were present on how the three branches of government would work. They questioned whether our democracy could stand alone or should reattach itself to the monarchy of Great Britain. The American Revolution was replayed continuously in the political minds of the nation at that time. Political games were played then as now in a never ending skirmish of influence and intrigue.

If Americans feel that our political landscape of 2013 is oddly out of place with our history, they would be wrong. Only in times of stark terrors of wartime has our nation had a central consensus; even then there were frenzied arguments on strategy and tactics.

As much as I hate to admit this, America has always been contentious about its sense of future and how to get there. Someone always sounds the alarm that what we are about to do is wrong-headed and will lead to certain disaster!

Well the disasters really haven’t occurred. History has happened. Events occur. Why and how they came about is long studied but rarely in agreement. Ours is a nation of free thinking and research. We think on our problems, our options for action and share the task with diverse thinkers and groups. Then we act and study the results. Then we argue for a few generations to determine if what we did was right or wrong, and who was responsible!

And somehow we live each day as though it is a given and we go on with our routines. The disaster still has not happened.

Opposing sides of political leadership maintains balance in our social contract – the Constitution. As challenges emerge and grow in importance political leadership circles need to coalesce from time to time and make decisions in common to handle the most important challenges. They have done that in the past and will in the future.

Today evidently the people have felt that emerging challenges are still too distant to require a coalescence of leadership. I guess the deficit really is not all that important or else the House of Representatives would not have authorized budgets and expenditures so out of balance with revenues. They also would not have approved tax reductions at a time of two wars and growing military expenditures.

No, the deficit can be managed handily with economic stimulus, growth of the economy, creation of new jobs which develop more tax revenues and cut unemployment costs. Growing tax collections will also fatten the trust funds for both Social Security and Medicare. And the annual deficits will disappear and surpluses will begin to eat away at the accumulated national debt. Over time this will come into a healthy balance.

The skirmishes for political positioning are empty but necessary. After all boys will be boys and politicians will be politicians. They will do what comes naturally.

Only problem is they are so nasty they upset our sense of civility. Can’t they play a little nicer while the pendulum of progress moves in its proscribed arc?

The state of the union is normal.

February 14, 2013

Voltaire and Others

Francois Voltaire (1694 – 1778) was a French writer/philosopher. One of his many quotes includes this one:

            “It is difficult to free fools from the chains they revere.”

Regardless of the facts we stubbornly believe in what once was a convenient truth; only now it lies in shambles. We tend to nestle in to the familiar even when proven wrong. It is one of the realities of political domestic life. That explains the success of cable network news programs. So many people seeking their own truth so comfort may be restored. Never mind the facts of the matter, or the science!

The same goes for intolerance and prejudice. We let go of things so very slowly. That is part of the reason history changes slowly.

Eleanor Roosevelt had this to say (often quoted):

“Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss  people.”

To discuss ideas great or small is harder to do. I can think on them. But to discuss them takes other people. If they are obsessing on events and other people it is very difficult to get them to switch over to discussing ideas. Have you ever had that point come to mind in startling clarity?

It did for me in the late 1960’s. I had been campaigning for Republican candidates for nearly three years. That was the era where most Republicans were clearly centrists and philosophy based. They were not narrowly focused on people and power.

I had been attending political events, organizing some of them, opening campaign headquarters in neighborhoods and distributing campaign materials. We often followed such events with cocktail parties and receptions where we had an opportunity to talk with other campaign staff and the candidates as well. One night I was struck by the inane, empty talk at these affairs. Silly and illogical. Petty and personal. Not policy and philosophy. I declared it such and stomped back to my car never to return to another such gathering. It was deflating and disillusioning. I was disappointed in my own colleagues to say nothing of the candidates and the party.

It was then I saw the beginnings of the war conservatives were to wage on the party itself. Despite my warnings they did take over the party and it became what we observe today. Right wing nonsense so out of touch with reality and the American people it cannot grasp the pathway back to normal.

Oh they will find their way eventually. It may take another generation. But they had better hurry or another party will form and take their place, further relegating them to total obscurity and irrelevancy. That’s not far fetched. There have been many parties in our nation’s history. They usually form around two basic political philosophies – conservative and liberal. Those two philosophies cover a lot of intellectual ground. There is no single idea attached to the core of either philosophy. Rather each gathers around a family of ideas that fit well together.

After that parties tend to shift over time embracing many ideas. Central to both parties, however, is the center of the political spectrum. Both parties are wedded to the center. However, to brand themselves as different they indulge in word play – Republicans latched onto ‘conservative’ while Democrats married themselves to progressive or ‘liberal’ ideology. Still both begin at the center and then move direction to find a home of identity.

Trouble is, to have any validity in their world they need votes and that pushes them away from ideas and toward people. The circle is complete and we return to admonishment of Eleanor Roosevelt.

Great ideas need more time in our lives.

A final quote mined from the internet:

            “People like their Constitution the way they like their Bible…

 Cherry pick the parts they agree with while ignoring or reinterpreting the parts  they don’t.”                                                      ~Anonymous

I’ll leave you with that thought.

February 13, 2013

Whatever Happened to...(you know who?)

Turned on the computer this morning and stared at my home page. Nothing interested me. Then went to email, processed a few messages, dumped several junk pieces. Within a couple of minutes I posted my blog message for today. (I wrote it yesterday in advance.)

Went back to my home page; still not interested. Went back to my desktop, spotted the Google icon and clicked on it. Cursor blinking at me. Blinking. Still blinking.

A name came to mind from far off. 1987 maybe? 26 years ago. A name of an acquaintance, a colleague, too. Wondered where he was and whatever happened to him. So I entered his name and followed the links. A lot of them. Not one related to him.

Got me thinking about a lot of people, then a general principle. Whatever happens to people once we lose contact with them? Sometimes it may surprise us to learn that a drudge-like person in our past turned out to be the executive of an innovative company. The guy’s a multimillionaire now. Wonder if he still acts like a drudge?

Another person was the belle of the parties and acutely sharp in her thinking. She is now a grandmother of 4, mom to 2 adult children, is very satisfied with life and retired in a warm, southern town.

Caught this on the internet this morning:

“I failed my exams in some subjects but my friend passed. Now he’s an engineer in Microsoft and I am the owner.

                                                                                    ~Bill Gates”

I doubt that is a real quote but it is a good one for today! The circumstances in which we knew someone many years ago does not compute readily to what they are doing today. The person we saw most likely to succeed may in fact be an abject failure.

And there are many ways to be a success as well as a failure. A rich person is a failure, in my book, if they are supremely unhappy or live a mostly unprincipled life. It doesn't matter how much they own if their stuff owns them and they only enjoy life because they imagine others thinking of them as being successful.

Conversely, the poorest person may be rich in mind and soul and feel success beyond our imagination.

I was speaking with a group recently and the subject of success came up. Most of the younger participants defined success as having money, a good house, and a nice car. Older people described success in terms of relationships that matter or an occupation that gave them a sense of fulfillment.

My hunch is that each person’s definition of success changes throughout life. What one wishes for because they don’t now have it (home, job, car, money) is soon replaced with philosophic wants once the material things are possessed. Material things tend to be transitory. They age, break, get rundown and worn and are soon forgotten. Other markers of life come to our attention. For some this is power and influence; others seek status and self importance. Still others want to keep busy doing something, anything. It makes them feel engaged and useful.

Trouble is success is what we make it. Often it is the simplest of things. And staring us in the face. Like love it is found when we aren't looking for it. It presents itself at odd times and places.

Do we notice?

February 12, 2013

Life and Death

Jack* had said he was unhappy and would choose when his life would end. I was stunned and stumbled around for appropriate words to share with him. I have no idea how well I did – or didn’t.

Then another surprise: he asked me to be his executor! Humbled by the request and now realizing his seriousness, I said yes but that I would need his help.

Weeks later Jack and I had discussed his situation, its prognosis (helpless) and what he intended to do about it. And when! I needed time to prepare for whatever was ahead, or so I thought.

He thought spring would be most probable, late April or early May. It was now February so I thought I had time to think this whole thing over. And I did. And how!

My first move was to ask a lawyer friend if I had culpability in Jack’s death knowing in advance that he was planning suicide. How much legal responsibility did I have to stop him or keep him from harming himself? The attorney said I bore no liability. The decision was my friend’s.

So I returned to Jack a few days later and asked him about what he wanted in his obituary. I know that may seem strange but I had the feeling that if I engaged him in the details of his own death I might persuade him to abandon his plans. Of course Jack had painted a dire image of his failing kidneys and rampaging ulcers. So I knew his health was the trump card in the equation; and pain. His pain.

First he helped me write the obituary. I stretched this out for three weeks. Then an epitaph. Finally I asked him to design his memorial or funeral service. That took quite a bit of time. But the details gathered slowly and the plans were laid out pretty well. Finally Jack provided me with a letter draft of his final wishes. Not exactly a will but it did lay out notification of next of kin, his final words to friends and family, and a detailed account of how his personal property was to be distributed.

When April and May passed that spring I asked Jack what his prognosis was; evidently he was feeling better and for a longer period than the doctors had projected. He responded with a new deadline of fall, perhaps as late as November.

We continued our routines of friendship. We talked about sundry topics. We laughed over life’s oddities. He loved intellectual exploration and discussion. His mind frolicked in such pastimes. And he was happy. Or so I thought.

Awaiting the dropping of the second shoe I remembered Jack’s anticipated season of death but couldn’t ask him directly. Would the doctors intervene, or would Jack have his way? Or would I find a way to stop him? The suspense built.

Finally, on December 14^th a police woman was ringing my doorbell. She asked if I knew Jack and I suddenly knew the day had come. Yes. That morning. A combination of prescription drugs and alcohol had done the trick.

My feeling was sadness but relief. I knew that Jack’s torture was over. And I clearly heard the second shoe drop.

The coroner had the body, the house was secured, notification of next of kin was next on the list, but first I had to visit Jack’s home and gather check books and other sensitive items. Friends were present and they shared with me Jack’s final letter. A day later I received the same letter in the mail but my copy complete with contact sheets and addresses of everyone mentioned in Jack’s distribution of property list. He had done more work than I thought. He had lived about nine months longer than he thought he would. I guess I had kept him pretty busy.

It is now February and the legal details are grinding slowly through the grist mill. The family has formally named me administrator of the estate but the court still must act on that request. I visited the funeral home at the behest of Jack’s dad. The coroner had given me the outline of the process to follow. Body pick up and then to a direct cremation. Ashes to be sent to Dad. Jack wanted his ashes cast into the winds of Yosemite, preferably at Glacier Point.

This week I hope to receive death certificates and court approval for me to get on with the formation of the estate. Then the long process of taxes, finances, house sale, distribution of goods and assets. This process could take a year or longer!

I don’t know if Jack’s church has performed a memorial service. His friends, however, have discussed his passing in much detail. Some anger and disappointment to be sure. But memories continue and in that very real sense so does his life. Although the end was unpleasant it was expected and his decision. He believed in a loving and embracing God. He was ready to go.

There is a post script to this account. Jack was not actually ill. Turns out he was in good health – no kidney disease. No fatal syndrome. The ulcers may have been real witnessed by his care of avoiding certain foods and the presence of antacids. No there was no fatal disease. Just a psychology run amok that amounted to the same thing. I was one of the last to know this. It was the coroner who told me. Jack had lied about being fatally ill! He had been right about one thing, though. He was unhappy in a way none of us could imagine.

February 11, 2013

*Not his actual name

Thought for the Day

Two thoughts to ponder this weekend. They are related I think.

The first comes from a billboard spotted on the internet:

            “Why is it only ‘class warfare’ when we fight back?”

Indeed! If a large group of people are made scapegoats by another large group of people, who is calling which group a ‘class’? When the group perceived as ‘lower’ or ‘lesser’ than the name caller, why is it class warfare when one defends oneself? Isn't the class warfare the actions by one against the other? Aren't they the definers of the warfare?

The second thought is from Maya Angelou:

            “The more you know of your history the more liberated you are.”

Seems to me Maya has this right. Only you have the particular history. It is yours. No one has labeling rights over you. The more you own your history the freer you are to live life honestly and openly. The class label-er becomes known as the fraud. Not you.

February 9, 2013

Coming to Life

What to write on this subject? And from what basis will the words flow? Will they be logical, emotional, poetic or prosaic? Will they ring true to your experience or only to a few others?

A commentary is never done. There are topics constantly present. This morning a sliver of moon hung in the black sky. As light dawned the moon slipped upwards and westward. Inky sky became deepest purple. Moments later a tinge of orange hinted sunrise. The day was breaking.

Changing light witnessed the comb of tree branches edging the horizon. Leafless now they will become feathers in place of combs for spring. Anyone else notice the ‘comb’? I first was aware of this many years ago as I drove from Texarkana home toward Illinois. I had started before dawn as I intended to beat an ice storm brewing in the west and promising disruption in Illinois for my trip if I didn't beat it home!

As dawn hinted its arrival I was fascinated by the comb-like effect of leafless trees on the horizon back lit by the rising dawn light. Comb was the word that sprang to mind. It stuck there all these years. A good look to contemplate as you drive 1000 miles in a day.

Artists have treasured the look of bare branches against changing sky-hues. Intensity of the light is one factor. But the barren branches are not straight. They are crooked and gnarly, bumpy and bud-laden for spring production of new life. Now in icy slumber.

Blankets of snow cover the ground, snuggling the expectations of greenery a few months from now. Safe in bed the grass keeps. Nature prepares its change of seasons well in advance.

Why this fascination with nature this morning? Why not? Life is all around us. Tempting us to respond to promise at every turn. Oh sure there are things on our to-do list today. Meetings to go to; meetings to prepare for; meetings to document afterwards and prepare the to-do lists of next week. There are people to see and transactions to complete. There are commutes and dressing, and bathing and eating. There is living. The time we spend in between the other items is meant for thinking and feeling. It keeps us anchored to who we are. It becomes who we are.

It is simple yet complex. It is challenging yet rewarding. It unfolds bidden or not. Intentional work helps it become more of what we want it to be. But we are not in control of that fully which adds more dimension and suspense to the journey!

Along the way we learn who and what are important to us. We also come to know ourselves better. The ‘I’ takes shape. Learning comes in bits and pieces. Work builds understanding but only if we let it happen. And put in the effort. Am I doing that? Are you?

“If someone listens or stretches out their hand or whispers a word or encouragement or attempts to understand a lonely person, extraordinary things begin to happen.”

                                                                                                ~Anonymous

What extraordinary things are we making happen today?

February 8, 2013

Genius and Longevity

I've come across people who are very bright. Intellectually alive and creative. Enormously thought provoking. Challenging conversationalists. Funny, smart and quick witted.

You surely know the type. I have stored in my memory many such people. As I journeyed on in life to other states, careers and regions of the country, I still think about these people. I wonder where they are. Some hearken from high school days, others from college, still others in various interest groups and organizations I have participated in over the years. Each connection yields at least one hugely smart person.

Then there are the true geniuses. These are the people who seem to inhabit a world of their own. There is a reason for that appearance: they usually are in a rare world of their own. It is where they can freely associate disparate ideas and connect them to discover other ideas of startling freshness and potential value.

Genius. What is that? Well, it is an almost primal sense of thinking on one’s own and coming to conclusions that are spookily on target; trouble is that person, the genius, is the only one who knows this. And he/she is very much alone in that knowledge.

Alone. Marooned, maybe. No one to turn to and say, “Aha! Did you just catch what this means?” and of course there is no one there to speak to; no one at all.

The genius may love other people, even a special someone. And perhaps a special someone loves the genius. The problem is they don’t think in these terms very often and communicate even more rarely. In a room of 5000 people not one can speak the genius’ language. In the world there are few who can converse on a level that resonates with him/her. Lonely? They must be!

What does this do to the genius? What feelings are embraced or feared? Or dreaded?

Einstein was a genius. He had a legendary sense of humor. He was married and had a daughter and two sons. Although his first marriage ended in dissolution he married a cousin later. He was not alone. He had professional colleagues he could work with and speak among. But intellectually he spent much time alone, listening to music and thinking upon long complicated theories.

Einstein taught, researched and held administrative posts. He had a career from which he retired but continued to collaborate with others until his death in 1955. He was 76 years old when he died.

Albert Einstein had social skills. He interacted successfully with many people. Odd personality at times, no doubt; but able to live in the world with diverse persons.

What is the opposite of this? Being a genius but lacking the social skills to get along with others? To build relationships with others? Love, laugh and have babies? Build a life that energizes the inner self?

No. There are geniuses among us who cannot handle practical daily living. Their strengths reside in understanding complex issues and making sense of them. They can take the esoteric facts of life – first of all notice them and keep them separate from the non-esoteric – and go on to discover how these facts matter in wondrous ways. We cannot do that; they can. Yet we can find love and love others; we can build families and careers and associations that build on one another to very high consequences.

The genius complex I am pointing out to you is the one in which the person cannot function fully on his own. He can think and create in intellectual arenas but he cannot work well with others in more personal matters. They are alone; very, very alone.

In isolation they lose touch with the realities we know well. And they drift off into a world of their own increasingly removed from the rest of us until they can no longer find their way back. They become lost; many never return.

I wonder how we can protect their unique gifts for their own good and that of society? How do we help them make the most of their lives?  Is it an institutional environment in which research, thinking and creation are the tasks at hand while living arrangements are carefully managed for their own good and safety? If so how do we make this happen? And if we are not doing so right now, how many geniuses do you suppose we are losing each and every day?

It makes me shudder. You and I know a genius. Will these special persons survive?

February 7, 2013

So What Happened?

I wrote a blog the other day entitled “Coming Clean”. I intended to share the blog copy with the youth AA group I work with on Friday evenings. I did read the copy to the group and here’s what they had to say.

The first person to respond said he was honored to be trusted with my message and appreciated the action. Another person said it was OK that I am gay and that I should seek happiness that works in my life. Another thanked me for sharing a serious message with him and the whole group.

That was the beginning of a lot of sharing within the group. My blog had also reported on youth suicides as a response to bullying. They engaged the topic wholeheartedly and explored suicide as an issue in many of our lives. They also delved into chronic depression. In an earlier meeting we had ascertained that all of the group experienced varying degrees of depression and had for most of their lives.

My action to share the blog with them was a demonstration of my willingness to share deep seated issues in my life with them, so they would do the same. I feel this process is invaluable in empowering the group to help one another. Early indications support that theory/hope!

Thinking back on the experience I have come to these conclusions:

·         Today’s younger generation is more accepting of differences among people than our older generations

·         Youth are more willing to examine hard truths than we give them credit for

·         Youth are more tolerant and flexible in dealing with diversity than older folks

·         Depression and substance abuse may be inextricably connected

·         Listen to youth and they will hear you

Now these ‘conclusions’ are temporary because most rely on incomplete data at any given moment, just like the rest of life!! But I feel these are lessons that will help me deal with the group and the individuals as time moves on. Once again I have learned more than I have shared.

This quote was on the internet a few weeks ago:

“A lot of problems in the world would disappear if we talk to each other instead of about each other.”                                                    ~Anonymous

A good thought worth remembering. If we get serious about the topics that matter in our lives, I have found most people are willing to have a good discussion about those topics. They sense the trust it requires to have meaningful discussions. They feel good about the trust and engage others in the discussion. If the communicators continue to demonstrate honesty and trust in their exchanges more honesty and trust is forthcoming.

Observe Senate confirmation hearings in Washington DC. Watch how nominees are treated by party association. Note that it is the President who is really the person of interest in these discussions and not the nominees themselves. It seems political ideology and power relationships rule the exchange of ideas. The tone is both uncivil and illogical at times. Strange that this is how our principled democracy of note handles its affairs!

If we want to understand someone and their thinking we must first listen to them and be sure we are capturing their meaning. If we don’t we are assuming way too much. And that leads to chaos, misunderstanding and incoherent communications. That explains a lot about Washington DC in 2012/13!

I suggest taking a good lesson from young people. Trust them and they will trust you in return. Listen to them and they will listen to you. Core intelligence among conversants will become apparent in their discussions if trust is present.

We have much to learn from each other regardless of age or life experience.

February 6, 2013

                        

Victim Mentality?

Found a quote on the internet the other day. It is from “unknown” of course, so many of them. Guess they don’t want to be known, but I don’t what you to think I’m thinking up all of this stuff!! So here’s the quote:

            “Life is too short to have a victim mentality. Say to yourself,

             I am not going to be bitter; I’m going to be better.”

A good thought to guide our life along the uneasy streets.

Being a victim is easy. It tells us that what I wanted didn't happen the right way; it happened the wrong way. Not my fault. It is either someone else’s fault or fate. Nothing I did caused the problem.

Well, wrong! Either we were not paying attention or we directly caused the problem by inappropriate actions. It is our life and we have more accountability for it than we think. Understanding why something happens is the first step to avoiding the problem in the future. We can’t control everything. But we can prepare a better way and remain out of harm’s way. Plenty of opportunities to take on risk and grow our person-hood  But that is a behavior that engages life, not running from it.

Victimhood is a popular game played in public these days. Yes we are hurt by huge powers like tornadoes, hurricanes, earthquakes and floods. We didn't cause them directly but we could live more defensively and avoid the injuries of their fate. If we don’t we have to be willing to live with the consequences.

Too angry with others – all the time? Petulant and cynical? Well that will earn you a consistent behavior from others. Smile and you will get smiles in return. Frown or grimace at the world and that will be your view in return!

The longer I live the more I realize the truth of this statement: I get more in return from honey than with vinegar. No doubt your grandparents shared that gem with you long ago. It was true then and is still true today.

Something called Soul Searchers on the internet gave us this quote:

“To be aware of one single shortcoming in oneself is more useful than to be aware of a few in someone else.”

Yes! The work to be done is with myself. It is homework done internally. It will give me life force and soul. It will construct good things in my life. No one else can do that for me; only I can do it. And the work I think really moves us beyond victimhood into totally responsibility for our own lives. Think about that.

Here’s another idea found on the internet that fits here:

            “If an egg is broken by an outside force, life ends.

             If an egg is broken by an inside force, then life begins.

             Great things happen from the inside.”

                                                                        ~Anonymous

I work with a lot of people broken by life’s calamities. They have responded with drug and alcohol abuse. Rather than mollifying the consequences the substance abuse only brings on more troubles and calamities. Undoing the nasties is a long and arduous task. A new way must be found. Some help is available for that, but really only the afflicted can do the healing, do the work, find their way.

Soul Searches gives us another quote that is helpful here:

            “To find your way, close your eyes. Listen closely and

             Attend with your heart.”

The victim is overwhelmed by this strategy and disappears. A fresh new being of purpose is born and moving forward. May that be the case for you and those close to you as we take charge of our lives.

Peace!

February 5, 2013

Sensing Soul

Anthony Douglas Williams was quoted on the internet the other morning:

“When I look into the eyes of an animal I do not see an animal. I see a living being. I see a friend. I feel a soul.”

This thought stopped me in my tracks. I glanced at my dog. She saw my look and stared back. Often I look up and she is sitting nearby staring at me. Those deep dark eyes, round and full of life. Just watching me. Still as a rock.

Of course I wonder what she is thinking; and yes I give her credit to think! So many times I’ve stared deep into her eyes and felt a strong presence.

There are those special times as well when she jumps up on my lap, snuggles in, and goes to sleep. Deep sleep. Trusting and secure. She is where she belongs. Her soul force is present and freely shared with me.

A delight in our lives. Willow is a small Lhasa Apso 7 years old now. A rescue, a companion, a lover and a partner. She watches over us and shares her home with us!

How could there be no soul in such a presence?

When we leave home for countless errands and appointments, she makes a play to come with us. She lets us know she is disappointed when we leave her behind. But do you know what she and your dog does when you are not around? They wait for you! Yes they do. And that breaks my heart in one instant but heals it in the next. Such loyalty and caring.

I think she needs us, but I’m sure she knows we need her. That completes our sense of home!

February 4, 2013

Thought for the Day

Speak the Truth

Found on the internet:

            “Speak the truth even if your voice shakes.”

                                                                        ~Anonymous

Has this ever happened to you? Perhaps it was with a parent, or child or close family member? Perhaps it was with a friend who has challenged you and your values? Or maybe it has been in public when the time finally broke when you had to say something about a matter you feel had been made light of, or misspoken about for far too long.

When you spoke, your voice took on the shakes. You stopped and swallowed and began again. But the shake was still there. Others stopped and looked at you, fearful that you were about to break into tears? You know that sort of breath-stopping-moment of silence?

This has happened to me. The easiest is with family and friends who I know will hear me out and treat my thoughts with dignity. The hardest is in public where the listeners feel no obligation to give me any room for compassion.

But I do it anyway. Speak my mind as best I can without anger. Even through the shakiness. It is a companion of my honesty – and earnestness.

Not a bad thing to have, I think.

Have a good weekend of restoration!

February 2, 2013

Gratitude

Judy Belmont writes a blog on emotional wellness. She shares her thoughts at www.dailypositiveinspirations.com. Recently she shared this thought:

“If you focus too much on what is not going well in your life, you will not be able to appreciate all the things that do!

            How about taking this moment in time to be grateful ‘no matter what’?”

Of course there are those of us who find it hard to be grateful for anything. But perhaps they didn’t try to be grateful?

Let’s try. For the first thing, we arose this morning with another opportunity to make a difference in our own life and the lives of others. The jury is still out on this day and whether we will fulfill the promise of that opportunity. But the opportunity stands before us nonetheless. What are we to make of it?

Second, I have family members with good relationships. Oh sure; I have bad relationships within the family as well! What to do about them is the work for another day. I’ve let it go this long so I can let it slide a little longer. Besides, I don’t really know what to do about those soured complexities! Maybe a little more time and pondering will help me with the task?

Third, I have friends. Most of these friends help me live life so much better than I could on my own. They care. They understand. They forgive. They are even more supportive than family members. Yes, friends are plentiful and oh so valuable in my life. It is a double pleasure: having the friends AND knowing I have friends. Those really are two different things. The knowing is especially rich!

Fourth, I am blessed with assets or strengths that help me live a meaningful life. That blessing I am truly grateful for. I can sit at a keyboard and write fluently what’s on my mind. Perhaps there are few who would want to read it, but no matter! What is important is that I can dump my cares and worries onto paper or electronic media. It is out of my head. It is somewhere else. Not inside of me making mischief!

I found this on the internet the other day. It seems to fit where I am in today’s blog:

“If you are reading this, you have survived your entire life up until this point. You have survived traumas, heartbreak, devastation, the different phases of life.

            And here you are. You go, m*****f***er. You’re awesome.”

That’s a good place to begin the gratitude exercise, don’t you think? We've come this far in life so we've survived a lot of heavy stuff. And we made it. So let’s be grateful for that and use the awareness for new discoveries.

Once embarked on the gratitude trail I think it will become easier to recognize the many things we take for granted. That’s a good place to find what we should be grateful for.

I found an appreciation for food I thought I had but really didn't  In the past I though I appreciated food because I lunged at it. But now I seek the flavor, the texture, the aroma and the feeling on the tongue. I sense the food as it is being chewed and swallowed and makes its way down the esophagus. Yes. So much more about food to be grateful for.

Birdsong. So plentiful in spring and summer. Less so in winter but then all the more rare and beautiful! Such a reminder that birds remain among us to survive the winter with us. I am grateful for that realization and sharing of the dark months.

Music. How it uplifts my thoughts, my moods. How it challenges the brain to conceive of the melody and harmony. How it make new ideas pop to mind. Music as diversion, as intellectual food, as emotional salve. Richness around us in sound. Some of it makes good sense. Some of it does not; noise until it gradually makes shapes worthy of thinking upon.

Books. Written thoughts from others that ease our thinking toward other objectives and worthy avenues. Pursuit of logic, history, story, emotional transactions and so much more. Instructive and expansive. Reading brings so much pleasure and challenge.

Jobs and careers. A chance to do good and useful things. The opportunity to earn money to pay my bills. Or to retire and volunteer to accomplish things others simply don’t have the time for. All these activities are a blessing, something to be grateful for.

Are you grateful? Are you aware that you are? Have you worked on this element of your life recently? Should you?

This is a new day. A new month. In a fairly new year. Let’s get to work!

February 1, 2013