Turning it All Over

When I quite smoking I was prepared. Months of thinking about it. Setting the day of final inhaling of smoke. A supply of patches at hand to ease nicotine withdrawal. So I did it. I quit. Four weeks later I was done. No more hunger for nicotine. Just the remaining hand motions reaching for a non-existent pack in my shirt pocket. Now eleven years later I still find my hand wandering for the non-existent pack, but still no craving for a cigarette. I had the proper help to chemically kick the habit. The rest was behavioral habit and that is done with.

Kicking alcohol was different. There was the chemical dependency certainly, but the rehab center covered that with a dwindling dose of shots for a week. The rest of the process was social, behavioral, and psychological. Complex, surely, but manageable.

The process required group work and therapy. Sharing and fellowship was critical for the process to work. Reading and study was another component. Still is. Weekly meetings ensure the lessons are at hand to use in my own life as well as helping others do the same. Psychological issues dwelled deep and needed more expert help. Faith in something larger than myself, and outside of myself, was the key ingredient needed.

I had been a person of faith – religious faith – on and off for many years. It was not a certain faith based on dogma; no that sort of faith was not part of my heritage. Mine was intellect driven faith and it did respond to the need. When I called on it!

In Alcoholics Anonymous we are asked to identify a higher power to relate to, to rely on, to turn things over to. The latter is the important part. Something or someone to turn over the difficult things in life to. I could honestly name this as God. And did. I turned over my doubts, fears and dread to him (or her, as the case may be!). He or She responded quickly. Alcohol left my life. It has been almost 11 years since this happened. And I have not looked back. Only forward.

Today it is not alcohol that bewilders me. It is concern over my nation’s inability to face reality and honest governance issues. That scares the hell out of me.

As I was stewing over this recently I realized I needed help to overcome my fear and loathing. I needed to turn over my dread to a higher power, my God. This process is slow to happen, but certainly in my near future.

I will report here how I do. Meanwhile I must continue to help others with their alcohol slavery. That work helps me stay clean and healthy. Somehow I think the process will help me manage my other dread issues, too. I will try. I have faith that it will work. Already I feel better. Perhaps you would like to join me in this effort?

Americans have a lot of work to do. Accomplishing it will come from reserves of energy and faith. Best we get at it sooner rather than later. Wish us luck!?

February 23, 2017