Women’s Success

I co-chaired a meeting the other night that specifically invited women to discuss their hopes and dreams of owning their own business. Twenty appeared. Their diversity was evident as they streamed into the room. Age, race, interests, passions and talents, too, were all evident in a wide array of difference. It is refreshing and reaffirming that so much possibility resides in the people we mingle with each day and so much more from those we don’t even see.

At one point in the evening we asked the attendees to share their candid definition of success. As we went around the room we heard stories of hope overcoming struggles and despair. Some shared tales of dreams put off by duties of motherhood. Others told of their battle with illness or addiction and how their lives turned around and now they are ready for the next chapter of meeting life head on. Around the table we went encountering fresh faces, some tears, but lots of smiles on heads held high.

I was moved by this honest sharing. But I was struck by this realization – not one of the participants had uttered a financial success definition in terms of money. Not one dollar bill was spoken of. Sure there were the phrases – “need enough to pay my bills and keep my family safe” or “of course we need to pay the bills but I don’t want riches.”

Success to these women was all about quality of life and self satisfaction. Most came from caring for others. There were intellectual and professional excellence goals as well as meeting the needs of others as fully as possible. Such goals speak to the heart and soul of a society, not just these wonderful women! It proved to me over and over again during the evening that our nation is strong and regenerative and focused on the right things.

That is not the picture we get when reading the newspaper or encountering the evening TV news.

Far from it.

When I listen to others speak I hear their pathos as well as their energy. Both relate messages of passion and hope. They dream dreams and see opportunities where others view only problems and crisis. These good people see tasks to do to help others. And they follow through on it.

I remember an act of kindness shown me as I stumbled around the streets of London on vacation. I must have looked quite lost. This woman of about 50 approached me and simply asked, “May I help you?”  And I said, yes, I was looking for a specific street and building. She took my hand gently and led me to the corner, pointed to the building in question, and said I should find what I was looking for there. My wife merely looked on at this tableau and smiled! A kind Londoner helping a tourist. Simple. Direct. Helpful.

And kind.

Do we do enough of this in our own lives? Do we see people in need and lend a hand? Helping does not always require a financial donation or an epic project. It often involves seeing and listening and simple acts to follow. And then on with our own lives. Done and over!

Why make such a project of everything? And yet we must if we are to build lives that matter. A job. A career. A business. Each takes our attention and preparation and earnest application of work. The reward should be impact on others if we expect it to have impact on our own lives.

In the final analysis it is about this impact not the dollars earned from our labors that matter the most. They matter to the others but also to us. Along the way something more is being constructed – a way of life to be followed by others – a social fabric that has muscle and stamina – a nation that has vision and lasting value.

We are the sum of our parts. And who we are is the sum of the many parts we have working within us. This is another measure of diversity. May we treasure this well and maintain it high on our value structure!

July 22, 2016