Most people think their efforts don’t matter. They don’t
like thinking that, of course, but they do. Their rhetorical question is –
‘whatever I do doesn’t make a blip of difference, so why should I care?’ There are variations on this theme of course,
and what they all lead to is a general avowal of ‘no’ when asked to do
something. No. An answer heard all too frequently in our world today. Why me? Indeed!
Why not? I suggest the alternative: Try the power of yes.
And that is what Meg has learned about herself. In her early
70’s she wasn’t very busy doing anything but puttering around her home and
yard. Neighbors chatted with her from time to time and block parties were
arranged once or twice during the year. But normally Meg had to find projects
to busy her at church.
Lately, Meg was asked by her pastor to take on a new project.
Meg was interested in the concept but wondered if she really had the skills to
do what he was asking of her. So she demurred and went home to think about it.
She also talked about it with her friends at church and in
the neighborhood. They wondered why she didn’t just say no and be done with it.
But Meg thought some more about the project and began mulling what it all
meant.
With her son and family in California and very busy with PTA
and boy and girl scouts, and her Ohio daughter’s family busy with winter sports
and school events, she didn’t have to worry about them. They were doing just
fine and didn’t need any interference from her. They needed their independence
and freedom to discover life on their own terms. What they didn’t need is a
meddling mother, or mother in law!
That’s when Meg began to notice something about her
volunteer activities. Each asked Meg to stretch her skills and experience a bit.
And she did. More deeply involved Meg also came to understand how organizations
worked; very similar to one another. Human nature was the common link to all of
them. And then she realized experience with one group gave her a better
ability to work with another group. In fact there were common themes that
connected most the groups in one way or another.
Skill development was not what Meg expected to learn from
all of this. Yes, she balanced her own check book and managed her own finances
and household. She had learned to plan her expenses based on expected revenues
and the timing of those. When asked to be treasurer of one of her groups she
shuddered and said yes. In time Meg learned how to be a good treasurer and
concluded it wasn’t much different from handling her own household books.
Around the house Meg also learned how to fix a run-on
toilet, a leaking faucet and how to change the filters on the furnace and air
conditioning equipment. At first these tasks seemed daunting but do-it-yourself
magazine articles told her exactly how to do each of these chores. In time she
became good at it. She only called a handyman or repairman when she actually
needed it.
In organizational life she learned to form questions the
group needed to focus on and find answers as well. She became a good board member
for some of those groups. And in time Meg concluded that volunteer work
stretched her abilities and talents. They were always there, of course, just in
need of exercise to develop into full skill sets. Just like life and career,
right?
So, there it is. Meg realized that doing volunteer work was
good for the intended parties, but also very good for her. She was happy being
busy. She was happy sharing what she could with others. And then she called the
pastor and said yes to the new project. Of course she did!
Meg also learned something else about life while thinking
over all of the above. It is simply this: life is not about who you are or what
you have. Rather, it is about what you do with your time. Is it focused on
others? Is it focused on problems and solutions? Or is it focused mainly on the
self?
Meg knows how to answer that question. Do you?
August 26, 2016
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