Being Happy

What makes you happy? I have wondered about that for years. I struggle to know what the term means. Of course, like many others, I wonder if I’m happy or just playing as though I am.

Happiness has many dimensions. Feeling happy is an emotion. Elated is momentary happiness for something very pleasant in life. A sudden good surprise? Seeing a loved one again after a long absence is an example. Winning a prize of some sort, getting recognition for something you have done are more examples of feeling elated. Those elevated highs ebb. We think back on them and receive more happiness from the initial moment.

Situation in life is a cause of happiness – having a pleasant home to come back to after a day of working; or working with friendly, supportive people in a place of employment, even having pleasant working environment while at work; sufficient income to pay the bills and have enough left over to plan on desired purchases, or planning a trip; knowing that household income is sufficient to nearly guarantee adequate housing will be a constant in my life; or food is readily at hand and delicious; no food insecurity or fear of loss; plentiful transportation resources, my own personal car, a new one at that, or a fancier one than others have; clothing is more than adequate, even stylish and makes me feel good! These are all examples of feeling happy for a reason.

As life continues through many aging phases, happiness itself is redefined. The causes of happiness are less external and much more internal. A friend once said he chooses to be happy. He said that in reaction to some of my critical essays that explored social ills and their likely causes, and solutions.

Choose to be happy? I’ve often wondered if that is true. Certainly, a positive mental attitude helps to be happy. But is it a simple matter of choosing to be happy?

I know people who work hard to make more money so they can buy things that will set them apart from others in society. It is a form of motivated class-ism. Is that really a road to happiness? A lasting road?

I think not. No, happiness is a state of mind that goes beyond feeling satisfied but doesn’t seek to outperform another person. Looking for meaning and value in life is a powerful builder of happiness, but is this a choice? A conscious choice?

A senior citizen has a lifetime of experiences to draw on. Those can be analyzed and used to deal with life. It is the inner wisdom gained by surviving to an older age. But seniors are not universally happy. No, they sense the end of life approaching. They wonder how much time do I have left? What will I do with this time?  Can I do the wanted things or will my health and finances block those options? Will this cause bitterness and unhappiness? Faced with the options, how do I handle those options? Do I feel happy or not after wrestling with the issue?

In my own case I focus on future. I create vignettes of what I hope will be, usually scenarios where current problems and crises are managed with better outcomes. Those are positive thrusts into the future. That makes me happy. Just knowing problems have solutions. Whether a society does the work to make outcomes better than yesteryear, is another matter. Often this is a cause of disappointment for me. Wasted effort. A chance to get something great done but society fails to muster the strength to get it done.

World peace is one of those disappointments. So too the overwhelming toll of poverty among so many. Or the lack of healthcare options for billions of people. Or the growing crisis of global warming. Adequate drinking water is another, proper disposal of human waste is another, especially in underdeveloped countries.

The condition of mankind is a heady ponderable. Solutions are not readily at hand. But they can be. Some take enormous resources while others will fall to the simplest of effort if we but try. Will humankind rise to the occasion and create a good outcome? Or will it fail to act and allow the problem to persist?

Hoping that good will be the outcome makes me happy. Knowing it is not automatic creates anxiety. We can and should take comfort in the successes. Just know they are momentary. The longer term still beckons for our investment today for solutions tomorrow, and the tomorrow after that.

Our work is not done. Age has taught me that. Good intentions are not enough. Dedication and persistence are needed to take happiness in desired outcomes. This is not ideology. It is hope for community and its success.

This lesson is known and learned by many people. When will the others gain this lesson? How can we help them along?

December 29, 2020