An acquaintance attempted suicide last week. This was the
second attempt we know of. A phone call from her to a close friend alerted him
of the situation. Police and ambulance were summoned and she was made safe for
a few days.
Her story is not known fully by me. I know she is deeply
troubled and has been for several years. Depression is a major factor in her
life. So is self medication to control the symptoms. That includes abuse of
alcohol as well. The case is complicated. Continue this behavior for too many
years and there is no return to a normal life.
The medications skew reality to the point that alcohol seems
OK. It isn't of course. Alcohol uncontrolled never is a good course. It
destroys human tissues throughout the body but mostly does brain damage. Too
much of this and you can imagine how the brain deteriorates. As the central
processing unit of our bodies once the brain is irreparably damaged so is the
life associated with the body. Institutionalization is one answer; a very sad
answer. Self management is the goal that avoids the institutional option.
Addiction to anything begins, I think, with not
understanding one’s own self and immediate situation. Allowed to roam freely
without discipline the mind can take you places very unhealthy. I found this on the internet the other day,
perhaps it fits nicely here:
“Whenever you find yourself
doubting if you can go on, just remember how far you've come. Remember
everything you have faced, all the battles you have won, and all the fears you
have overcome. Then raise your head high
and forge on ahead knowing that you got this far!”
~Anonymous
A survivor of many storms is one way of seeing the self in
troubled times. It is the upside of the misery we have experienced. Sensing
survival is a good thing for the afflicted. It becomes a small but important
building block to health.
I know that once through the immediate storm laughter may
return. It is a surprising appearance, laughter. It forces a momentary glimpse
of our own control! To be able to laugh through tears or agony is the body and
soul forcing its way to the surface for survival!
Addicts often feel alone. Even in a crowded room they may
feel lonely. Connection to others is in paralysis. Connection…so much
needed…but so unattainable.
From Facebook.com/chee.tang.779 comes this quote:
“Sometimes you just can’t tell
anybody how you really feel. Not because you don’t know why. Not because you
don’t know your purpose. Not because you don’t trust them. But because you
can’t find the right words to make them understand.”
Finding those words takes patience. It takes sorting out
thoughts of conflicting meaning. It requires discipline to state the feelings
plainly, simply, directly. Don’t make it too complicated. Pull the primary
ideas out of the mass of other thoughts running through the head. Write down
short sentences. Practice doing this. In time order will emerge. It is a
learned capability. We are not always born with this ability. We have to nurture
it. In turn it will nurture us back to health.
L.R. Knost shares this idea with us:
“It is not our job to toughen our
children up to face a cruel and heartless world. It’s our job to raise children
who will make the world a little less cruel and heartless.”
If we can use this principle to guide our parenting style
and performance, I think we have a chance to improve life on this planet by
bits over time; meanwhile we are helping the planet not get worse. Both are admirable goals!
Those of us, who are ‘normal’ or think of ourselves as such,
have a hard time grasping what a ‘non-normal’ person experiences. It is why we
need to practice compassion and live by it. There are those who need our
compassion directly applied. But many more will benefit from a compassionate
environment not directly applied. It is felt. It is noticed in little ways.
Those in distress will know it is safe to just be. During those moments of
‘being’ they are safe to explore the inner self. They sense they have the time
and space to sort through their feelings and ideas. They can begin the journal
of written thoughts. The building of inner discipline to giver themselves a
chance to gain self understanding. And self worth.
In the right environment the addict can return to a healthy
life. They are strengthened by this. So are we all!
From Facebook.com/Happysmiles comes this quote from Peanuts:
“Life isn't meant to be easy; it’s meant to be lived.
Sometimes happy, other times rough…
But with every up and down you learn lessons
that make you Strong!”
A good place to end today’s message!
May 29, 2013
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