Opening Closed Doors

From www.wisdomquotesandstories.com comes this:

“In life we sometimes feel that all doors are now closed for us. If that happens in your life remember a closed door is not always locked.”

I have an acquaintance that has had a long stretch of difficult times. She is a substance abuser, frequently unemployed, cozies up to friends for help with the basics in life – food, housing, companionship – and avoids making the hard decisions she could use to build a life of self reliance. A victim she is of…what exactly? An attitude? Bad breaks? A disease?

I’m not sure. I make a bad judge of these matters so best I leave that alone. What I can do is help her recognize the real world. Help her confront the things she can change. Urge her on to accept a more responsible role for her own life.

Yes we all confront closed doors in life. But as the quotation reminds us, not all closed doors are locked. Turn the knob and push – and it may open to a fresh opportunity. Try the door. If it opens, walk through and explore.

It’s like another quote from the internet the other day – “When you really pay attention, everything is your teacher.” (Author Unknown) Open the door and face what is behind it. Study it for the possibility it may hold for you. Understand what it is and where it may take you.  Build the possibility. 

Ignoring the reality of our surroundings condemns us to losing the good or at least not taking good advantage of the good that presents itself.  My acquaintance could use these attributes to also avoid the bad that is buried in our context.

She lives in a negative environment. A free tenant in a house being readied for an estate sale. It is a construction zone. It is chaotic, noisy and a mess. In this place she has recently attempted suicide. She is most unhappy with her present housing. Yet she does nothing about that. Moans a lot and complains. But does nothing constructive to find another place.

My role in this? As estate administrator it is my responsibility to preserve the value of the asset of the estate – the house itself – and her presence is impeding that effort. The suicide attempts divert energy from solving problems – hers and the household’s; and they only serve to complicate the issues rather than solving them. My untrained hunch is she needs to be in a medical facility that will care for her and provide her skills to take charge of her own life. That will be up to her or the courts to decide.

I cannot live her life for her. None of us can. It is her life to do with what she will.

Og Mandino was a long time motivational speaker and author. His advice to all:

            “Always do your best. What you plant now you will harvest later.”

Recognize doors are to be opened as well as shut. Possibilities are to be explored and adapted to if they fit the circumstances. Attempting such actions are the seeds of the future. They may not yield immediate results but they very well may in the future.

How can I help my acquaintance see the opportunities rather than the barriers? Any ideas? Or should I just leave this to others and the courts?

Time will tell.

June 17, 2013