The nation is reeling from an ugly election season that
seems to have been nonstop for the past 24 years. That’s bad enough but when
the most recent season harps on emotional weaknesses and biases, then things really
do turn ugly.
Although our history is mainly of white races, we are not
all white. In fact we are less than half white statistically. And the rest of
the population is comprised of racial, ethnic and blended families for a very
long time.
We are an immigrant nation – built by them, for them and of
them. That is the cornerstone upon which America rests.
Looking at our masses we are also made up of men and women
in nearly equal parts as one would expect. We are also straight, gay, bi-sexual
and transgender; like it or not, it is true, and each of us knows or loves
someone who is not straight. Each of us. If you think not, then some of your
closest allies in life are too afraid to share this information with you for
fear of your reaction. Think about that. Just think about it.
Someone long ago asked if I were a feminist. And I said yes.
Why wouldn’t I be? I have a mother, two grandmothers, 5 aunts, many grand
aunts, a sister, and now a wife (then ex-wife), daughter and two granddaughters
and a daughter in law. By marriage I have the same in the extended family
units. Why would I be against the well being and just and fair treatment of the
women in my life? I must stand up for them. It is a very simple fact of life.
Immigrants built our nation and each of us is in one form or
another an immigrant. The only differences among us is when we or our families
became American, and under what circumstances. Our cultures have become merged
with the rest of us and we have become one America . That is as it was designed
to be and why our Constitution is such a marvel. Not perfect, but still a marvel.
If I cannot accept or tolerate someone different from me
than I am actually not tolerating myself. This may sound illogical but if you
ponder it long enough it will make sense to you.
It is hard to accept or tolerate an angry, hard nosed bigot
staring me in the face. It is hard to accept or tolerate a smug, wealthy know
it all who makes light of the hardships of others. It is hard to watch people
who abuse women, children, the poor and the lame for their own financial gain
or elevated sense of self.
It is even a fearful realization when one considers those
same people mean you harm and/or death. If you are a Jew from the World War II
era, I know you know what I mean. If you are a Jew today, I know you know what
the past has taught you, and us.
I am gay. Do you think I feel safe all the time? No. That
would be unrealistic. Do I feel intimidated now? A little, but not a lot. But
then we just won the right to marriage and have had the wedding. Now it could
be taken from us. And it will if enough of America doesn’t stand up and stop
that from happening. Just like the Jews and the Holocaust.
My son married into a marvelous, Hispanic family. Enormous
(to us!) but loving and caring and bright and forward looking. They are
treasures. And they have the same problems and issues that the rest of us do –
the fight for good and stable jobs, careers, a just economy, gender issues just
like our own and so much more. We are one and the same.
My daughter married into a family of eastern European
origin. It is large, complex and extended beyond our wildest experiences. All
nice people. All with hopes and dreams like our own. There are no differences
among us. We suffer and emote the same. We have similar problems and successes
fighting them.
Accepting something makes it a real part of our life. We may
not understand everything or like it but we must accept it. Then we can deal
with it. Then we can internalize the differences so they mean something – good,
bad or otherwise.
The move of America
to an era of Donald Trump carries a message of change. Whether the change will
be administered with kindness and love remains in doubt. If you are female, gay
or foreign, you have a right to be worried, even frightened. The rhetoric of
the campaign was stark and hideous. Violence was waged in many places. Violence
is threatened today in many places.
But if we allow fear and intimidation to control our lives,
we will have given into the bigots, misogynists and ignorant. Please don’t let
that happen.
Mr. Trump seems to be unaware of what he has unleashed all
the while stirring it up to win the Presidency. It is now his job to quell his
supporters and make peace. That is what a leader does. This will be his first
task to accomplish.
Time will tell if he and his team are up to the task.
Meanwhile the rest of us have our usual jobs to do to earn a living, and our
jobs as citizens to watch those in authority to do their jobs by the law.
We are in this together. So act like it and support the
dream of what we know America
can be.
November 18, 2016
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