It can happen anytime. It did for me.
What does the future hold for our family unit? Where will we
live as financial circumstances lessen and limit choice? Availability? Will we
have choice? Or will someone or something decide for us?
Do alternatives even exist for people as they age and grow
more limited in abilities? As the body encounters limits what about unlimited
vistas for the mind? Will our ideas be valued? Will our life talents be
welcome? Can we write and create and discuss things that matter? Will we feel
at home?
How close will family be? Ours is scattered – Illinois , New
York , Arizona
I don’t wish to be depressing about this topic but it is
naturally depressing. As health challenges absorb assets, as assets are
exhausted and Medicare and programs for senior citizens take on more and more,
choices become limited.
The family homestead has dropped in value by nearly a third.
Existing mortgage now stands $30,000 above market value. Property taxes,
maintenance, HOA fees, and utility costs have made living here impractical,
indeed, impossible. Mortgage payments have ceased; HOA fees kept current, same
for utilities. Maintenance expense is incurred to keep plumbing and mechanical
systems working. We safe guard the property until it is sold on short sale. We
await a new owner and a closing so we can move on to the next chapter of our
lives.
What will that chapter hold? What can we reasonably expect?
We are open to co-op living, co-housing, elder apartments, senior condo
communities. We do not need assisted living. We need no nursing care. No
medical landlord hovering overhead. No, we are still independent and wish to
remain so.
Our home community has no elder housing programs at all. Our
community is a family affair where the young come, have babies, raise kids
retire and stay put. Some move to new career horizons from time to time. Some
retire and return here. But only if they have the financial resources.
We don’t. One spouse lost his job and employer with the
recession after 30 years of building a business. No retirement or medical
benefits. The cost of recession. In human terms.
The other spouse was self employed and experienced health
problems that made it impractical to continue the business. Paid down
liabilities. Closed the business. Jumped onto Medicare and Social Security
programs.
Adding our assets together, zero financial assets. Plenty of
home goods to nest in future locations. Just no way to get there. What is
needed is affordable rent or purchase options based on social security
household income. It would be helpful if the home is located near services,
amenities and medical facilities.
More important is the sense and feel of the new home. Does
the new community welcome new people? Do they encourage sharing talents and
skill sets? Do they nurture those personal assets? Do they want us?
How do you find a new home under these circumstances? How do
we master the internet or social networks to find a way – our way – to a new
home and all that means? And can we retain our family connections?
Just asking. We are not the only ones with this story in America . It has
been happening for quite some time now. The recession has only made it more
difficult, more apparent.
Does anyone have an answer to these questions? Or even care?
March 20, 2013
We had all better care about each other and about finding an answer. This isn't simply a recession problem; it's a societal millstone issue, compounded by the graying of America as the Boomers start hitting retirement...underfunded and unprepared for the unknown that follows. The humiliation of becoming dependent on one's family, the uncertainty of coping with the next health crisis, the inability to perform physically those activities that used to come without effort or thought.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was a child, our town had "The Old Folks' Home". Fast forward seven decades and we have a cafeteria of eldercare opportunities, but most of them force us to relocate away from friends and neighbors or to commit our last dollar to them in exchange for the roof over our head in a dorm room with a meal...IF we can afford that.
Warrenville is a fantastic town and I've been in love with it since I first moved here in 1986. It hurts to have to leave it because Warrenville has no affordable senior housing for those of us who have little means.
The most menial of employment opportunities for those of us in our autumn to winter of life are by necessity taken up by younger people who still have the energy, the children or families to support and often those who are bi-lingual.
Life continues to offer us opportunities to learn, to change, to adapt----simply to deal with it -- on its own terms. And it continues to offer us the peace and contentment and bliss of acceptance and gratitude when we learn to love it -- on its own terms. We simply need to choose to gratefully accept learning, changing and adapting--and to watch for the rewards and the miracles still left in front of us.